He called up and said that I have some problems with my wife and I want you to help me. So, this is what I do and I am good at, please explain me in detail. he said that I am fine, I am very flexible, she is very rigid, you need to help me in making her understand that she needs to be more flexible in life. It made me smile because so many times I get to talk to people who say, all the problem is the other persona and I am doing fine. Makes me wonder, are they in oblivion or totally blind to ownself? I would not say faults because we all are designed in certain way and we need to see ourselves the way we are rather than a supreme personality. We do not have to demean ourselves too, we simply need to accept ourselves the way we are. So as he said that she is very rigid, I asked him if he gets pain in his neck sometimes and he said that yes I have cervical issues. When I sit for long hours in office, i get pain there. But you sit for long hours almost every day why do you get pain sometimes not everyday. I told him that call me up next time when you get pain and then we would talk. He called up after a week and said that he is unable to get relief even after eating his pain killer. So I asked him about his entire day in office and at home. He had certain issues with international clients and they could not see his view point from Indian perspective and he could not see their view point from American perspective. But what that has to do with pain in neck? Our physical body is an energy system and our emotions drive our energy. Various parts of body are associated with various emotions. Our neck represents perspective, which allows us to turn around and see other sides. But when we are stuck in our perspective, our energy gets blocked and our neck gets affected and we get cervical pain. So the next question was, should I simply accept what they are saying and the answer is no. But you have to understand with love that they are coming from different perspective which is not wrong and you have own. You simply need to make an effort to understand their perspective. He called up after one hour and the pain was gone. Now the next question was, why did you ask me to call you back when I get neck pain for my personal relationship. The answer is simple, you are rigid and you think your wife is rigid as she is unable to accept your opinion everytime you have one. Whenever she rejects yours, you feel she is rigid and you get pain. Though rigidity is inside you, you feel your wife is rigid. Her certain behaviors are triggering a part of you which you need to work upon inside you.
Every person we meet is our own mirror. The behavior which is bothering us in others is inside us and instead of working on others we need to work upon ourselves and that is the reason we are able to see that in others. A person with lots of ego, would always tell others, you have so much ego because his focus is ego. A person who lies himself would never trust others and would say do not lie, I would know if you would lie. For him everyone is lying. A fat person or who is working on his body weight would keep evaluating everyone’s body! A good person will feel that everyone around is good. So instead of blaming others, finding faults in others, if we would focus on self and start working on self, we would be able to make a bigger improvement. But if we keep finding faults in others, we would only waste own time.
