Few years back I went through separation. It creates one of the darkness around us. I was surrounded by darkness. I was filled with darkness. I felt like no one needed me. (In reality may be because of one person’s judgement, I felt like I did not need myself) I felt like I was not required. But then, all the things which have been told started making sense. We tend to choose negative more than positive. I started choosing negative and then realized it is not helping me. It was drowning me further into the darkness. Like attracts like. So one day, I decided I would not die like this. So I got up. Went to the balcony. It was winters. Saw an old lady walking in torn clothes, trying to shrink into her own body hoping she would feel less cold. I got inside, gave away my heaviest but favourite sweater. She was smiling and I felt peaceful.
I realized that we cannot wait for others to come and love or heal us. It is not their duty. It is our own duty. We all have the capacity to love and heal. When we love, we get healed. When we love, Universe loves us back in every form. I smiled for the first time in many months. I looked at myself but this time not with pity but with a smile. I told myself what all needed to be done and I did. Then I started looking for the work again. Few years, it went with lots of struggles, but I kept loving myself and anyone who would come on the way. I received so much love from even strangers. I wondered if I deserved so much love and I still wonder. I started feeling better and I started feeling I could help people more. I was always praying, God please help me in helping people. Somewhere I was having a feeling that this is the way of living.
You love and you get healed. You love and you will be loved. You heal and everything else gets healed. You give and you will receive. Do not hold anyone else responsible for who you are. Become who you want to be. You have the capacity to love, to heal, to be abundant, to be happy. BE a creator of yourself.
