One gentleman was never happy. His wife was tired of trying to make efforts for him to be happy. She got tired and frustrated. All the time she had to hear his frustrations which was breaking her confidence too. She started feeling that there must be a problem with her too. When she started feeling so bad about herself, she started making some online researches and she found out that to keep him happy is not in her hands. It is his decision and habit. She started observing that when he was happy or when he was so unhappy. She realized even while being in the best of set up, he was not happy. When his parents came home and brought gifts for him, he had something bad to say. When his friends called up to check upon him he said they must need something from him and that is why they have called up. She could not help her husband much but the good thing was she stopped blaming herself. She started training her children too for the same. That everyone is responsible for own feelings and we shall not blame others. being happy or being sad is a habit. A happy person is mostly happy and a sad person is mostly sad. Being angry also is a similar decision. A person who is in habit of getting angry will get angry irrespective of what is happening. So we must realize that we are responsible for own feelings and we shall not blame others for same. So how do we accept the responsibility of own feelings and take charge of life:
1. Stop blaming others for how you are feeling. Even if the emotions are triggered by their actions. We need to understand to feel a certain way is our decision and if we allow others to take charge of our feelings we can never be happy. We would act like they have our remote control and they can play the channel of their desire.
2. Ask yourself more and more questions. Why are you feeling certain way? What has made you feel bad? Is your own expectation? Is it the situation? May be the person is designed to act in a certain way and we need to accept the person the way he/she is rather than feeling bad every time.
3. We can never control what others are doing or thinking so no point in trying to manage that part of life. We shall give ourselves freedom of own feeling and we shall give same freedom to others. They are allowed to hold their own thoughts.
4. To feel good in life is own responsibility and we shall make a constant effort for that. instead of expecting others to make us feel better, we shall make own efforts.
5. More we would depend on others for our feelings more miserable we would be. More we would take charge of them, more we would be able to be happy.
Always remember being happy/sad/angry or anything is your decision and your habit. Choose a right one.
