Sometimes we think that the only relation
which can go awry is between a husband and a wife. However, every relationship
has the tendency to go awry if it is not properly nurtured. A 54 years old
gentleman held so much hatred against his father that he was even ready to kill
him if given a chance because his father had beaten him up when he was small. A
20 years old daughter was always abusing her mother because her mother used to
use abusive language when she was small. She would hit her and abuse her. She
used to be frustrated because of her family pressure and take it out on
daughter. The daughter always used to scream that this is what you have given
me, now take it back. The mother was at receiving end and was always focused on
one thing that I am doing so much for my daughter and this is how she has been
treating me. The relationship improved when she started looking at things from
daughter’s perspective. She realized that her daughter is in too much pain and
is unable to handle things. The mother started bringing in love for her
daughter rather than arguments all the time and the relationship started
changing. She could do this only when she started looking at what her daughter
is doing and feeling rather than what she herself was doing and feeling.
which can go awry is between a husband and a wife. However, every relationship
has the tendency to go awry if it is not properly nurtured. A 54 years old
gentleman held so much hatred against his father that he was even ready to kill
him if given a chance because his father had beaten him up when he was small. A
20 years old daughter was always abusing her mother because her mother used to
use abusive language when she was small. She would hit her and abuse her. She
used to be frustrated because of her family pressure and take it out on
daughter. The daughter always used to scream that this is what you have given
me, now take it back. The mother was at receiving end and was always focused on
one thing that I am doing so much for my daughter and this is how she has been
treating me. The relationship improved when she started looking at things from
daughter’s perspective. She realized that her daughter is in too much pain and
is unable to handle things. The mother started bringing in love for her
daughter rather than arguments all the time and the relationship started
changing. She could do this only when she started looking at what her daughter
is doing and feeling rather than what she herself was doing and feeling.
Every relationship stands on 3 pillars of
love, trust and respect. If any of the pillar is not there, then the
relationship would collapse. Most of the times we keep looking at what we are
doing in the relationship and forget t respect what the other person is doing.
We need to respect everyone’s efforts and we also need to trust own intentions
as well as the other person. If you do not have trust, you cannot respect
too. If you do not respect a person, would you be able to love? So we need
to bring in love, trust and respect all of them together to nurture our
relationship. Now, the situation needs love, who brings it does not matter.
Often we wait for the other person to bring it but we forget if we start adding
more love, it would anyway heal the situation. The wait might be little longer
but would be worth. If we would wait for the other person to bring, then it
might never happen. If there is no love from any of the sides, be it any
relation, the relationship has to collapse. However, from one side atleast if
it keeps coming, which means true in intentions and feelings, then it would
start flourishing. If from outside we are doing many things but from inside, we
are only feeling bad, we have negative feelings, then it will not survive. So
keep adding love to your relationship and it will start prospering bringing you
the fruits and flowers of happiness and love.
love, trust and respect. If any of the pillar is not there, then the
relationship would collapse. Most of the times we keep looking at what we are
doing in the relationship and forget t respect what the other person is doing.
We need to respect everyone’s efforts and we also need to trust own intentions
as well as the other person. If you do not have trust, you cannot respect
too. If you do not respect a person, would you be able to love? So we need
to bring in love, trust and respect all of them together to nurture our
relationship. Now, the situation needs love, who brings it does not matter.
Often we wait for the other person to bring it but we forget if we start adding
more love, it would anyway heal the situation. The wait might be little longer
but would be worth. If we would wait for the other person to bring, then it
might never happen. If there is no love from any of the sides, be it any
relation, the relationship has to collapse. However, from one side atleast if
it keeps coming, which means true in intentions and feelings, then it would
start flourishing. If from outside we are doing many things but from inside, we
are only feeling bad, we have negative feelings, then it will not survive. So
keep adding love to your relationship and it will start prospering bringing you
the fruits and flowers of happiness and love.
