A gentleman was feeling very depressed. He was cursing himself for one hour. All the time he was telling how unfit and bad he was. in terms of looks and work and everything else. How he was unable to take care of everything in his life. Finally when he stopped, I asked him, what about the things he was able to do? He was shocked. So he sat and made a list. Things which he was unable to do were also there in another list. Now, most of them were there as per others expectations. Whatever he could do, he was already doing.
Since childhood, he was criticized and compared and he had accepted that as his natural self. He had forgotten how to be appreciated and how to love himself. Now, the big question was, we have been taught to love others and not self. Exactly, we have not been trained to appreciate and love self. Infact we have been told that if we appreciate self, it is bad of us. We do not have to go and brag to anyone. But yes, internally we have to appreciate self. We keep criticizing instead of that, can we learn to appreciate?
How can we give to others what we do not have. We can give only what we have. So if we keep criticizing self, this is what we are going to give to others too. If we will learn to appreciate and love ourselves and treat ourselves with kindness, can we image how much we will be full of same? And how much we will showering that on others as that will be our true nature? Can we imagine in that case we will never have to worry about what others are thinking of us and if they are liking us? We will never have to worry about relationships too. As everything will be full of love and kindness. So this is what will be there everywhere.
So everything starts with treating self with love and kindness.
Tell yourself
I love, I am loved, I give love.
