Our parents would die before us, spouse comes later, children come later and we die before them. We spend half life with previous generation and half life with next generation. We are taught to think of everyone else before us. We are taught to serve everyone else before us. We do not want that, we want to think about self first but are suppressed to express that as we would be titled as selfish. However now the big question is, who is not selfish here. Even the person who is a philanthropist is. In this life you live with yourself most and still you are taught not to think about self and as we think but we do not express we feel guilty. We start thinking that how can I be this selfish.
If you think about yourself, you are not selfish. However, just do not be mean because when you are mean, you manipulate others, which is not correct. If you think about yourself, you become your best friend. You start connecting with the self. You know who you are, what you can do. You do not live a suppressed life. You live a free life. When you are free, you do not try to bind others. Generally, humans have a tendency what they did not get in life and always wanted that, they do not like others to have that. I have seen parents telling their kids, we never did that, so the big question is, what is the problem, I got it or you never got it? I am not pointing at parents, I am just stating a fact here. If you live a free life, you do not make others victim. You do not try to suppress others of what you do not have because you are the king of free will and you are able to exert it.
So many times I am blamed for teaching selfishness and making people focus on self and we are taught since the child hood that we should keep others before us. However, my point is, you can give only what you have and cannot give what you do not have. If you have suppression, you give suppression, unintentionally, you make others victim of what you are victim of. If you are free and happy, you give same happiness and freedom to others.
In this life you need to spend maximum time with self, you are the most important person in your life, so you need to like yourself, love yourself. If you do not love yourself, you can never be happy and if you are not happy how can you give happiness to otehrs. Tell me, would you like to be a friend with someone whom you do not love or like? I guess no, so you need to love yourself, like yourself unconditionally, so that you can be happy living with the self.
