“It is always lonely at top”
We are capable of fighting and handling most of the things in life but we get scared of self. Over the time we grow up, we realize we have lots of insecurities, fears and guilts which do not let us be with ourselves. So many times I meet people who are afraid of looking themselves into the mirror. They get disconnected from self and thus start disconnecting from others too. We feel others are not reaching to us but in reality we stop reaching to people.
We came alone in this world and we have to go alone. We cannot expect our loved ones to die along with us. Even if there are people who are there to support us, our life has to be led by us only. We cannot trade our lives with someone. That happens in movies only. We change our lives as per the thoughts and circumstances and as per the mile stones we set up but together it’s still our journey. We meet many people on the way who may walk along with us for few miles, but ultimately we have to travel this journey on our own. However, higher we go in life and lonelier we get. So why do we feel lonely, whenever our need for social interaction is more than our current social interaction we feel lonely and when we are with self, this loneliness scares us as we feel we are growing up alone. To have the feeling of security we make families and friends expecting that we would not grow alone. But who guarantees that after 30 years of marriage there wouldn’t be any divorce or your kids would support you till the time you die. We know that old age homes are full of people who have been deserted by their families.
Feeling of loneliness is in our thoughts mainly as we start feeling lonely. However, the good news is most of us have to go through this feeling and how we handle this depends on us. If you think people who are on top do not have this feeling then we are mistaken. So many times I wonder, when we have to curse the system and the Prime Minister we have so many places like we make forums, we may protest or we may write but where would they go and write that they are scared at that moment? Who is there to hold their hand and say “do not worry, everything would be fine.” Like in our job we have moment of insecurities and fear, in their job also they would have moments of insecurities. So many times situations are so difficult to handle and it is so hard to decide. But can they go and tell anyone, what would happen if their decision goes wrong? We are afraid of one person criticizing us and when they do, even if it has a positive impact, they will be criticized. They will be criticized either way. Can they go and tell anyone, I do not like this politics, I do not know what to do in this situation, I do not know, how would I handle so many scams, personally they are not done by them still they have to shoulder the responsibility and still keep their smile intact. They cannot say, I did not do, so I am not responsible. Can they share all their feelings with anyone? Personally they are kept in such high esteem that we refuse to believe if they have any such worries but like you everyone else is a human being and if you have fears everyone else has to. If you have a feeling of loneliness everyone else has to. So do not get scared when you do not find anyone to share your woes. It’s same like you feel scared when you are sleeping alone. You feel scared only if you think you should be alone however, if you chuck your fear aside thinking that most of the singles sleep alone and nothing happens to them then you will not feel scared and if something has to happen it can happen even when you are with someone else too. You are lonely and scared only if you feel so.
Moreover, have you thought of one thing, that even if you get to share with someone and he/she holds your hand and says he is with you in what may come, you feel immediate strength and you feel good but what has changed? Absolutely nothing! It’s still you who has to handle everything and every situation. It’s just a support in your thoughts. So if you learn to hold your own hand, you will never feel lonely.
