He was crying as he was feeling lost. A 30 years old man was crying like he was living in a jail. He said its like a jail and it is suffocating. He can’t even breathe properly. He said I do not know what i should be doing in life. Uptil now, I have been following everyone and whenever something goes wrong I am blamed. My father would instruct me to follow something strictly and if it goes wrong, he would blame me that can’t I use my brains? Things like these happen everyday. I do not know what else needs to be done. My wife does not trust me, says I would do whatever others would say and this is how I have been trained since childhood. I always took pride in being a good son which means doing everything what my parents had asked me. Now I had a question! What is being a good son has to do with doing everything your parents asked you to do? You can be a good son by taking care of them, by standing by their side and for that it is not necessary you follow all their orders. That way you have lost yourself as you are living their life not yours and that is why you are feeling suffocated. because you have imprisoned yourself behind what others are expecting from you. You are no where outside. We started walking and went to a park. Flowers were in bloom and there were varieties of flowers. I asked him, would these flower look beautiful if you try to prune it as per you? It would lose its original beauty as well as any beauty. It looks beautiful because it is allowed to blossom the way it wanted with its natural color and design. Similarly, we are beautiful when we grow like that. We will not be able to look beautiful if we are not allowed to be who we are. His next question was so what should I do? Should I disrespect my parents? absolutely not. But who said having your own thought process makes you disrespect them? He was shocked. You need to express yourself and for that you have to know first who you are and what you want. He spent a lots of time in contemplating on self, what he wants, how he wants, also focusing on creating love between his parents and himself rather than feeling that he would be upsetting them. He had to travel a journey and he could but he had to go through the transition too. He gave freedom to himself and in that process he could give it to others too. he allowed his parents to express freely because he did not have the fear that it would be imposed on him, he gave to his children too.
Allow yourself to be who you are. Do not worry about what others are thinking of you as you have no control over them but yes intentionally do not hurt anyone including you.
