There was an old man who had many bitter experiences in child hood. His brother used to beat him up a lot and he held that scar through out his life. He held his mother responsible for this as she had taken up a job in a small village and did not keep him with herself. She wanted her children to have better education in the city, so she kept her sons with her husband. The small heart could not understand her true purpose and started harboring hatred towards his mother and brother both. Some scars are for life and this was one. Now, if we go deeper, our first image of a woman comes from mother and first image of a man comes from father. In his case, his father was not there, so brother was around and he used to beat him up and this damaged a man’s image in his heart. He did not receive motherly love and for him, she was the culprit, so his that image was damaged too. He was creating a bad image of everyone in heart this way. He could not create a good relation with his wife and got divorced as for him somewhere she was a culprit too. He used to beat his children a lot as this is how he was being treated as a child. He was in pain and he was inflicting same pain on everyone around. Because of so many blockages in his thought process, he could not create a good career also and he was in financial pain too. He could not survive in any job for more than few months and he hardly had any income source. He wanted to resolve his life. The way is not outside to inside but inside to outside. So he had to resolve his feelings internally rather than resolving his life outside. Finally, he started working on his emotions, forgiving himself and everyone else, also understood and accepted everyone’s intentions and worked on finding peace. Once he was emotionally stabilized, he contacted his ailing mother and patched up with her. He forgave his brother and patched up with his own children too. Uptill now, he was blaming everyone around his his life circumstances but now, he accepted everything. His stable emotions helped him in having a stable behavior in his job too and once he was stable, his finances also improved. His life was much smoother and happy now but for that he had to work on bringing in the joy first and then the outer life resolved.
This may sound like an extreme example but if we pick up few chunks from his life, we would realize that whenever we are in pain, we bring that pain onto people around us too. Whenever we are happy, we bring same to others. Whatever is happening in our lives is our responsibility. When we accept that, we can make the changes. So whenever we feel pain inside, we need to release that, resolve that and stay peaceful and happy. Sometimes a simple change in perspective, acceptance of situation, self talk, or a simple decision to forgive and not to stay in pain also helps a lot.
