He was separated for 4 years. His family told him that he could not take a divorce. He was under the pressure. His business was not working well. He wondered what wrong did he do in the relationship?
I asked him, if you did not do anything wrong, did not mean you did anything right also. So what efforts did you make to create a good relationship? HE thought back and did not have an answer. For him he was providing the needs of the family and rest should have been taken care of. So it is like I am going to the office everyday and business should work on its own or I am going for the job every day, so everything should happen on its own. Can it happen that way? No! Then how can beautiful relationships happen on their own?
So what do we do?
First of all, create a picture of your relationship like how do you want your relationship to be. Then accordingly start putting an effort. Also, we need to realize that often our references come from parents or other relationships which we have seen before. Things have changed, the way a relationship looks like also has changed. Our mothers would have survived with just the money at home. They may not be happy but they may have survived. But with the changes happening around, next-generation may not survive just with money as they can earn it. So they need emotional fulfillment also. We need to make efforts for everything.
Like a plant needs to be nurtured every day, health needs to be taken care of every day, and business also needs to be taken care of every day,, our relationships also need to be taken care of every day. We need to put in efforts to make it better. To make it more beautiful.
So what can be the efforts?
Taking care of each other’s emotions, respecting them, making an effort for each other’s happiness, being there in each other’s need, giving required space too, helping each other grow, sharing the family responsibilities, expressing love and doing everything with love rather than as an obligation.
