Met a couple, they had been married for 40 years. You look at them and you would know that they are very much in love. They were holding hands practically, all the time. Looking at them brought a lease a fresh air. So I asked them if they had been through rough patches? Did they fight and all?
The gentleman smiled and said that of course. We did fight and cleared out misunderstandings. But she always came back to me. Initially, it was her, who kept coming back and did more and then it was me more. But if we look back, it did not matter overall it has been the same and we cared for each other same. So what’s the secret?
We settled when we finally realized that to get more, you have to give more than that. You cannot look at what you are receiving, you just have to give and give. Daily you need to ask, what more I can do for her or for my relationship. You can never say, I did it for you because you are doing it for yourself. If you would think that I am doing it for her, you would get tired and you would expect more. But when you know that you have done something for yourself, you do not get tired and there are no more complaints. I realized this after a few years and then we really felt love and deep love. He looked at her again with so much love.
He said it all so humbly. She kept listening and did not say a word. But when he looked tired, she simply asked, can I get you some juice? She cared for him and he cared for her. They both wanted to do more and more for each other. They both were getting so much from each other, without asking, without saying.
Things do not happen on their own, you need to make an effort. For your relationships too. Create a happy one, loving one.
