A girl had an aggression issues. She used to fight with her mother everyday. Because of day to day altercations, environment in the family was very stressed. Her younger brother was also getting affected. She used to fight with him always and he also had started fighting with his parents and her sister. It was like no one wanted to resolve things and everyone was just fighting. After talking to her, we found out that she idealized her mother like many other children. She found her mother perfect in everything like managing relationships, handling home, taking care of kids and managing a relationship with in laws. She felt that there could not be a better lady than her mother and she wanted to be like her mother. Her mother also unintentionally was putting that pressure on her to be alike. She could not be like her mother which no one can be because we all are designed differently. This frustrated her day and night that even after trying her best she is unable to become like her mother, she did not get her own approval and her mother also didn’t appreciate her or her efforts. This frustration turned into aggression and day and night she fought with everyone. All this while she had been comparing herself with her mother and kept losing a part of herself. I asked her when had she felt happiest? She shared about her past relationship where she expressed her love the way she had wanted. There she did not have any pressure to become like her mother! Bingo….. So it means, if you really want to be happy, you need to be who you are rather than trying to be someone else. But her mother is perfect! There is no one perfect here or imperfect here. She is perfect as per you but may not be as per me or someone else. Our perfection is in imperfection as we are good the way we are designed. We cannot find faults in God’s creations. Everyone is perfectly created by God and this is what makes this world beautiful and colorful. She understood the point and started working on herself. She improved and established her own art and craft academy.he no longer fought with her family, infact she supported them in every way. All the problems were there because instead being who she was she was trying to be someone else. When she release that pressure to be someone else, she was shining brightly.
This life is a journey of self discovery. If we are not discovering who we are and what we are capable of, our soul would never be satisfied. That is when we want to hear about self, we want to read stuff which can tell more about self and we go anywhere where we feel we can find more of self. But if try to be like others which mostly we keep doing and that is why we keep comparing with others too, we tend to lose self. So ask yourself:
Who am I
What do i want
How do I think
How do I want to react in various situations
What does matter to me
What are my priorities like work, relationships
What is one special thing I have
What can I gift to the world
Keep discovering yourself and you will keep blossoming like a fresh flower every day! Once you start discovering yourself, you will never have to compare yourself with everyone. You compare and feel lesser than others because you haven’t found the best part of yourself yet. To find your own best part, you need to start discovering yourself now!
