One girl was constantly feeling bad and she had been feeling bad for various reasons. She grew up as a pampered daughter and she never had to listen no for anything in life. Infact she was the one, who would scold anyone in the house. She got married with time and new family did not have same emotions for her like her family had. So her real journey of learning started now. She would end up scolding anyone or saying nasty thing to anyone like always but now, she would hear back and now, when ever she was not around, she heard many things about herself. She felt that everyone was talking bad about her which she could not tolerate. She was losing confidence, she was in pain but still she did not know how to handle. She started feeling like she was the worst person ever born.
She wanted help and her current family also wanted help as they also were unable to live with her tantrums. When she approached me, I asked her to start doing something good for someone everyday, first within the family and then outside and not to expect anything in return. Because if she will expect she will never be able to do and she again will fall into that trap. It worked! She would anything for anyone randomly, initially once in a day as an exercise and later on it started coming naturally and then it was for more than one person. That may include buying a chocolate for a kid, helping someone in the kitchen etc.
So what she realized was, she was always focused on how others are to her and what they did not do for her, but she never thought that how she was treating others and what she did not do for others. Then she did not hear bad words about herself. But before that she started feeling good about herself as she knew she was doing good. And also, she started hearing some good things about herself too. But she did not need any approval now.
