She grew up in US which gave her a very liberal mindset. Her father shifted to India when she was 20 years old and she got married into a joint family. A girl who had lived an open life style all her life suddenly had to adjust with many people, their expectations, opinions around. Her husband evaluated her on the basis of how happy his parents with her. She was having a constant pressure on her head and eventually she started losing her peace of mind. This frustration lead to depression and then aggression. She reached to an extreme aggressive stage where on any small incidence she was ready to hit her husband, shout at her in laws, throw things around or even hit servants. People were scared in her vicinity. She always blamed others for her situation and if she would lose temper. she would blame others. She could not take a divorce as her father had told her that if she takes a divorce there is no place for her at his house. She said that I cannot be peaceful until all of the people in her house change their behavior. Can it be possible? It is not! The only solution is she had to be peaceful and if that is dependent on others, she would never be peaceful. To be peaceful has to be dependent on herself. Finally she started working on few things:
1. Building her self esteem. It had deteriorated a lot. As for few years she was depending on others opinion of her which was not so high. Now, if you do not think good of yourself, you can never be happy. If you are not happy with yourself, nothing can make you happy. Once her self esteem started recovering,, she started stabilizing more.
So does not matter what is your age, do not see yourself from other’s eyes. See yourself the way you are. Spend more time with yourself to know yourself more.
2. She started working on how she would want her life and relationship to be rather than what is wrong. This gave her an opportunity to think what she wants and then she was able to take those steps. Often we all focus on what is wrong but what is right has to be done by us.
3. She started meditating, which helped her in creating peace inside. It helped her in remaining peaceful in many situations.
4. She started affirming positive things to herself multiple times a day. In a way she she trained her mind to think positive. Often we keep thinking many negative things through out day and this creates only stress. When we are stressed, we can give only stress.
We all need to remind ourselves of positive things everyday like I am loved, I am happy, I am peaceful, My life is good, God loves me, always good things happen to me etc. Everyone can write own affirmations.
She started working on herself at multiple levels and it took her almost a year to recover. After that she did not even need medicines or any treatment. Once she was peaceful, she was able to create peace in her life and relationship.
