Lots of time people come to me and they say, they are so confident about themselves and they do not give a damn to others. After sometime they ask me, tell me how do I look, rate me on my looks and when i reply that it does not matter how you look, what matters is what you are and how you are so they ask to judge that. I do not judge people either. Everyone is unique and I have no right to judge anyone, why should I? That is done by government in a very refined process in courts, so why should I waste my energy in that? However, the big question here is why do people want to be judged?
First thing, they want self affirmation that yes I am good and second thing they are conscious of what others think about them. They want others to think the way they think about themselves. That’s why they ask, how do they look? Three types of people never ask about how do they look, first who under rate themselves about look and second type for whom looks do not matter and the final one they know what they are and they do not rely on any ones approval. They are charismatic people and they know what effect they have and they know their strengths. The second type, are sufis type, for them what matters is the person not anything else. These people are more of creative sort and they can create bliss out of anything. The first type is most diffident type, these people lack self belief and they do not know that everyone is unique and everyone holds equal charisma, however, if they have not found their own charisma, you cannot expect them to project it on others as you project what you feel. These people really need to work on finding the self and affirming self belief.
Now going back to the first type, who just want a reaffirmation of own thoughts actually lack self belief that is why they just want a reapproval. They project something which they feel they might not be. They better check their preferences and the inner fears which are pulling them down because they are trying to hide them under a facade.
Just accept yourself the way you are and accept everyone else too. Do not depend on any ones approval just make sure you have approved yourself.
